Have you ever felt committed to something and a distraction presented itself that took you off course? For myself, I can answer that question with a gigantic YES! How did it feel to be derailed or to derail yourself from your task(s)? It’s never pleasant when our focus is taken away from something that is most important to us in the moment.
It's so important for us to recognize the distractions in our lives. When we ignore the things that take and keep us off course, we cannot walk in our purpose. Sometimes, we may even feel like failures.
Distractions can be anything that interrupts our course of thought or our life plan. It draws our attention away from the task(s) at hand or personal goals we create. Some of the greatest distractions people encounter is negative people, fear, self-doubt or criticism. A very common distraction can simply be our thoughts, also known as cognition. These are unhealthy ways of thinking. Cognitive distortions are distractions that can keep us from a rich and fulfilling life. In short, cognitive distortions are faulty or inaccurate thoughts that play on a continuous loop. For example, a person experiences a horrible relationship and instantly, he/she is a poor judge of character! This is my mediocre example of over generalizing, which is a common cognitive distortion. We all experience these loud nuisances in the background of our life. Check out some of these common distortions.
While I can recount previous experiences that would allow me to categorizing my own distortions, I’ll just share one with you because there isn’t much room on this blog page! Have you ever heard anyone say, your words have power? Well, on more than one occasion, I can remember being told that my writing skills were horrible. I’m sure it was probably factual at the time. However, I’ll never forget a very critical statement made by one of my English professors. She was less than kind and neglected to use a teachable moment for good! As a result of this experience, for some time, I engaged in negative self-labeling and mislabeling. I held on to thoughts like, “I am stupid”, “I will never learn how to write well”, and “I am lazy”. It took much effort to dismantle those distortions. I learned to change the way I think about myself, my writing skills and my mistakes.
It's not enough to know about distortions and distractions! We have to be able to do something about these loud nuisances. We have to learn how to turn them so far down that we barely notice them. Ultimately, we must decide to minimize the distractions around us! Sometimes, simply disengaging in unproductive relationships and unhealthy thinking frees us up to enjoy life more. There is no set formula to achieve a fulfilling life! However, we can lessen the emotional and mental burdens in our lives by making significant decisions.
For example, decide what unhealthy distortions you are keeping alive and jot them down. Think about how and why they may not be good for you. Next, decide how you would like them to function in a productive way in your life. What can you do to make your thoughts more productive? Ask yourself are these thoughts true or false and what makes them true or false.
Challenging our unhealthy thinking may require much work but it is worth it! I'm a sucker for making lists or journaling. Make a list of the negative thoughts or cognitive distortion/distractions. Decide what thoughts you want to tackle first. Journal about the frequency of the negative thought and what is going on around you at the time, when the thought occurs. Reflect on how you feel in the moment when you have the negative thought; what did you say or do when the thought surfaced? Identify a positive thought to pair with your negative thought. Usually, the positive thought is the opposite or a different spin on the negative thought. Write that positive thought in BIGGER BOLDER writing or highlight it! Once you've paired your negative thought with a positive thought, leave the negative thought on the paper and out of your head!
Let me just say, that the previous paragraph isn't in any way a resolution
in lieu of counseling, venting to a really close friend, exercising or heeding
the advice of a medical/mental health professional! Until next time, live easy!
Bibliography:
Grohol, John. '15 Common Cognitive Distortions'. Psych Central.com. N.p., 2015. Web. 2 June 2015.
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